seeing the baby

i went for a routine check-up this morning. my gynae had a new set of medical equipment. so, this time, when he scanned my tummy, the image was clearer. i could see the baby's backbone and face. the gynae even said it's amazing what technology can do for us. my main concern was as usual, the health of the baby. and when it's time for me to pay the bill, i had to pay extra rm20.00. i guess, better technology doesnt come cheap. by the time i was done, i was hungry coz it was already lunch time and i had to send my mum off to klia at 1.00pm. rushed back to mum's place, had a quick lunch and i felt guilty for not being able to bring along my daughter.
by the time i got back to the office, i was tired and sleepy and had a slight headache.
thank god tomorrow is saturday. and i could rest until monday coz it's labour day rite?
happy holiday everyone.

lonely

my grandmother was admitted to hospital recently and last nite, mum had to stay overnight at the hospital. i took rania along to my office in the afternoon coz she was crying and begging me not to go back to the office when i checked on her during lunch time. i didnt want to bring coz with my condition rite now, i cant handle so many things. but her cries broke my heart so i made her promise to not disturb me at the office later on. i let her play the pc and when she got bored, she asked for milk. i reminded her not to fall asleep coa the last time she had milk at my office, she slept like a baby and i had to wait for her to get up. plus, there's no place i can put her to lie down so, what i did was, i put her on my rock-hard table. thot that could wake her up but it didnt. so, when she wanted to fall asleep yesterday, i said, 'hey, u promised mummy not to sleep kan...' after 5pm, took her for a walk though i wanted so badly to go home and rest. i juz didnt have the heart to upset her. she was happy 'jalan2' alrite.
it was a very quiet nite coz she slept early and i got to watch csi without any interruption. since she slept early, she woke up at 5am this morning. gosh!
i couldnt sleep well last nite. was it because of the baby kicking inside me or something's on my mind? i cant figure it out but it could be both. hmmmm.......

when no means NO!!

i have one annoying insurance agent. juz before i went for umrah, i met up with him at my office to renew my insurance and my daughter's. i dont think i want to meet up with him again for the next 12 months. the signing and filling up forms were done within 5 minutes. and so, when he called me after i got back, i was so annoyed. he knew i never pick up any of his calls so he called me up from a different number. he wanted to come again to have a 'cuppa'. i told him i was very busy and i didnt have time to entertain his visit. i asked what was it all about and he said something about capital guaranteed investment plus unit trust. i told him off by saying i wasnt interested at all. then, he smsed me to ask whether can he have a 'cuppa' anyway. it was soooooooooo annoying that i didnt respond at all. and today, he called from a very strange number that i thot only overseas ppl used the number. i picked up thinking it was my brother who called. and when i heard his voice, i was again annoyed. he insisted on coming to my office and i said, 'up to you but i'm very busy.' he came at 3pm and i gave him the disinterested look and told him that i can only spare 5 minutes. he explained the investment plan thing and immediately after he's done, i said i wasnt interested at all. he asked why and i explained that we bumis have other channels to invest that give more returns than what you're offering rite now. i left him abruptly without even saying thank you. i told him many times not to come coz i wasnt interested but he insisted on coming. i didnt feel guilty at all coz i was honest in the first place but he juz didnt get it.
this wasnt the first time. he did it once when he wanted to deliver a gift from the company for the coming new year. i have been making myself unavailable for a long time until he finally giva up and he delivered the gift at my house. luckily, i wasnt around. can u imagine someone coming to your house unannounced? i wouldnt mind if it was my relatives or friends. when i checked, it was only a tiny organizer that can fit my post box. apparently, he wanted to explain to me about will-writing. Gosh!
that reminds me of a friend who always think highly of himself. more on him later....

derivatives, call and put options

that's the topic of the course that i have to attend on saturday. a few days b4 i was supposed to attend, i've been asking ppl to go on my behalf. i was willing to pay. the organizers wont be able to know. i knew a few who do that all the time. we have to attend 2 courses in a year in order to renew our license and to me, spending weekends at home is something i look forward to. so, when i have to attend a meaningless course, i was a bit reluctant. saturday came and i attended. i was sleepy and tired but surprisingly, the speaker was interesting. i did yawn a few times but i didnt go empty-handed. i packed along a few sweets to keep me awake. it started late and finished early. all of us were happy when the speaker said he will end it at 3pm istead of the usual 5. i wanted to puke when somebody actually pat the speaker on the shoulder and said, 'make sure u finish at 5pm ok...' yucks! goody-goody...and this person was actually sitting next to me, nodding intelligently every once in a while. i'm allergic to this type of ppl.
and he had the heart to actually mention that 'some came to collect the points only unlike him who went for the knowledge'...double yucky! duh....some ppl still think they are cleverer than the rest.
at least i've completed 10 points and now, i have to attend another 10-point course for me to be able to renew my license. by hook or by crook, i have to attend the latest by next month coz i'm due in june. another saturday will be wasted then. oh no, i really WANT to go for the knowledge, actually.......

so good to be back

i rested for another day at home after coming back from umrah. i still cant adjust the time yet and so is my daughter who refused to sleep even after 2a.m. this is one active girl. as for me, i've been taking morning and afternoon naps coz when we were in mekah, all we did was pray and sleep, pray and sleep, pray and sleep. but nobody could challenge the biggest 'napster' of all; my dad.
i started going to the office yesterday though i was a bit lazy, i must say. had lunch with hubby and we went to chilis to have dinner. i was craving for the eggrolls for so long! thought of ordering every single thing on the menu but that was a bit ridiculous, i think.
juz got back from my favourite salon. i was a bit late so i persuaded my stylist to do everything in 2 hours' time and she did it. i was in the mood of pampering myself more but gotta get back to work. i guess, massage can wait till tomorrow. the shampoo girl actually thot i was fat! not pregnant but fat...i didnt know how to react to that. should i feel insulted or what? i'm 7 months pregnant now and yet some still think that i'm juz...well, fat. i did give her a fake laugh, though.

meaningful journey

as some would notice, i didnt update my blog coz i was away to perform umrah. yup! finally got the visa last minute, a day b4 we were supposed to go. went back to jb a day earlier coz the flight will be at 1.oopm and we were to depart from changi. leaving hubby was the most difficult thing to do. felt like crying but since mum was around, i cried in my heart.
it was a tiring and exhausting journey. it took us 24 hours to reach madinah from the moment we stepped out of the house. by the time we reached madinah, it was near to subuh prayers so we didnt rest at all. the first shower was heavenly. i must thank god coz my little girl didnt make a fuss at all on the long-haul flight and she behaved so well! i was sneezing the whole time on the flight but the moment i arrived at jeddah, the sneezing and flu was totally gone.
we got to stay for one night only in madinah and 6 nights in mekah. too bad the hotel in mekah wasnt what i expected. it was a bit frustrating the moment i arrived in mekah but after a few days, i got used to it. i was missing hubby so very much that i cried everyday juz thinking about him. i was quiet the whole time and i knew it worried mum and dad but i juz didnt have any mood to talk to anybody at all. luckily i got my little girl with me. she kept me sane. there was this moment where i think god was punishing me coz i kept thinking of going home as soon as possible. never had that kind of feeling b4. the feeling of mega-sadness and emptiness surrounded me. i thot i was going crazy. it was mental-torturing! on the last day b4 we were to depart from mekah, i seek forgiveness from god in front of the kaabah.
we stayed 2 nights in jeddah and by that time, i was calmer and back to my usual self. the first thing i did was to find a bookstore and bought 2 books to keep me occupied. after so many days of having nasi briyani, having mcdonalds was like having a meal with a king. this time, i didnt buy any souvenirs for anybody or for myself. i juz didnt see the need to buy.
the moment i saw hubby, i was sooooooooooo relieved and happy!!
but this time, i vowed to never go anywhere without hubby ever again...

bye bye hubby

today i'm supposed to go back to jb with my daughter and mum. if we get our visa by today, we will have to depart from changi airport tomorrow. if the visa is not out yet, only mum and dad will go coz i dont think i'll be able to carry my 'excess baggage' later on. if we go, we'll be away for 12 days and that is one difficult task for me coz i'll be away from hubby. i'm gonna miss hubby so, so much. i'm so used of doing things for him and i'm a bit sad coz i cant make him the routine morning coffee. me and rania will definitely miss him at night. but if i dont get to go, i'll definitely be back this weekend. half of me really wants to go but at the same time, i dont want to leave hubby alone. the next time i go, i'll definitely want hubby to come along.

in a dilemma

i'm supposed to go for umrah this week. but apparently, we still havent got our visa yet. the embassy will only issue on the 31st of march and it takes 10 days to process. my gynae allowed me to go up until mid-april only. i'm pretty upset coz i wanted to go so badly. but my body doesnt allow me to be so active. it makes me recall the time i went with my daughter and parents 2 yrs back. it was such an exhilarating moment that i promised to come back. i didnt plan to go, my father made me go. (he's good in forcing ppl to do things the way he wanted)
i remembered i was quite reluctant to go coz i wasnt ready. i guess that's the usual answer ppl would give if somebody asked. but the moment i touched down, i felt so calm and happy and at that moment, i knew i would enjoy every moment. my little girl behaved so well and i never expected it to be so easy and simple. i enjoyed having ice-creams after asar prayers every day, the nasi briyani was to die for and let's not talk about the kebabs which was mouth-watering. true enuf, i gained 4 kilos when i got back but it was too tempting to not enjoy all the food. when i came back, i was seeing our local nasi briyani on a different light.
i wish i could go again but it all depends on the date.